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| Fifty Shades #1 |
Rating: 0.25/5 (Just for the fact that it actually managed to get published)
When literature student Anastasia Steele goes to interview young entrepreneur Christian Grey, she encounters a man who is beautiful, brilliant, and intimidating. The unworldly, innocent Ana is startled to realize she wants this man and, despite his enigmatic reserve, finds she is desperate to get close to him. Unable to resist Ana’s quiet beauty, wit, and independent spirit, Grey admits he wants her, too—but on his own terms.
Shocked yet thrilled by Grey’s singular erotic tastes, Ana hesitates. For all the trappings of success—his multinational businesses, his vast wealth, his loving family—Grey is a man tormented by demons and consumed by the need to control. When the couple embarks on a daring, passionately physical affair, Ana discovers Christian Grey’s secrets and explores her own dark desires.
Let me start off by asking how on earth this was published in the first place? Anyone who is active in the literary world knows this started off as Twilight smut fanfiction and just reading the first chapter you can see the parallels between Edward (handsome, confident and mysterious Christian) and Bella (brunette, clumsy, awkward and daggy Ana). It hurts me to know that this is what the publishing world has come to, taking fanfiction, changing the names and calling it a new story. Not that fanfiction is bad, I'm a reader and some writers are very good but if they get published it should be for more original content. I'm referring to Cassandra Clare who started in Harry Potter fanfiction and is now a successful original author.
So considering that issue is out of the way lets take a look at the book proper. What makes it so riveting and popular? Well I can tell you it ain't the writing. As soon as I read the first line I wanted to throw the book and give up on it. "I scowl with frustration in the mirror. Damn my hair - it just won't behave, and damn Katherine Kavanagh for being ill and subjecting me to this ordeal." Really I've read better written fanfiction (oh snap). Even Lauren Kate's Fallen is better written and more interesting than this drivel and considering my dislike of that book Ms James is doing a stellar job of making me want to burn every copy of this book just to save to world from having thier brains explode over the crappiness of it. And here is were we insert angry Gray fanatics cries of indignation at hating on thier book.
So the characters...well other than the fact that they're Bella and Edward clones, they suck. Really Ana is just another TSTL lead female, seriously girl if your brain is telling you to run, you bloody well run, you don't listen to your hormones that's what guys do (no offense to all the guys out there). But really she is rather dull and stupid, I don't care much for her and despite knowing there's another two books I'm kinda hoping her clumsiness will trip her in front of a moving bus. Lets not even get started on how long it took her to catch onto him being abused as achild, so much for brains. And if I have to read about her inner goddess one more time I'm gonna smash something and then have my inner ninja kick her inner goddesses ass, because ninjas are much cooler :). Now Christian...I know I'm gonna get hate mail for this but WTF do so many women like him? He's not sexy, he's down right creepy and a bit of a sleaze bag. He's far too full of himself and is a cheavanistic pig. Really you would think all the women out there want to go back a few centuraries where they were owned by men, thanks but no thanks I'll take my freedom. On that note as far as my knowledge of BDSM goes, which doesn't go that far, people into that scene can hold perfectly healthy relationships, they just like it a bit kinky in the bedroom. They don't train their partners like dogs either just to pleasure them. Really I am worried for the female population if this is their dream man. And let's not even get started on the contract because that's just weird. But really Christian reminds me of a commercial, 'Dont cross the line', which refers to abuse and hunny if your scared of your bfs anger I'm pretty sure he's crossed the line into abuse.
The relationship: this is the most unhealthy book relationship I have read. This is not a healthy relationship people, don't endorse it, and I'm not even talking about the BDSM aspect. As said above the fact that Ana is scared of Christian's anger and the fact that she can't think straight when around him is not good. She should have been able to leave him alone a long time ago no matter how much it hurt. And when she finally did, Hallelujah, I did a little happy dance because that should have happened a couple hundred pages before, unfortunately I'm pretty sure they get back together, go ahead Ms James it's like taking candy from a baby, it's just cruel. On a side note: when you ask your bf to beat you as hard as possible, you really can't make judgment calls.
So if your into badly written books, unhealthy relationships, annoying characters, just like feeling your brain cells die one by one or are into mummy porn than this book is for you. For us sane ones I will continue to judge people who read this and liked it, so sue me. That being said I will probably read the last two because I'm a masochist and don't like leaving series unfinished because you never know it might get better...who am I kidding?
However, after reading this I have a new sense of how hilarious it was that my friends mum had no idea what the book was about and went to buy it for her husband :D.
The Kill Order by James Dashner
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| The Maze Runner #0.5 |
Rating: 2/5
Before WICKED was formed, before the Glade was built, before Thomas entered the Maze, sun flares hit the earth and mankind fell to disease.
Mark and Trina were there when it happened, and they survived. But surviving the sun flares was easy compared to what came next. Now a disease of rage and lunacy races across the eastern United States, and there’s something suspicious about its origin. Worse yet, it’s mutating, and all evidence suggests that it will bring humanity to its knees.
Mark and Trina are convinced there’s a way to save those left living from descending into madness. And they’re determined to find it—if they can stay alive. Because in this new, devastated world, every life has a price. And to some, you’re worth more dead than alive.
Considering my love hate relationship with the trilogy it was no surprise that this book was the same. Unfortunately, I think this book was a bit disappointing as I was looking forward to reading about Tom and Teresa and how their story began. Instead we're handed a whole new bunch of characters that I really couldn't care less for.
So let's start with the plot, it was ok but not what I would call fantastic. For me there was too much action and not enough character development, and while I'm all for action there needs to be a balance. The book was all safe scene, fight/running scene followed by a safe, fight/running scene and so on and so forth. Because of this I found it difficult to keep reading, I think I could've put this book down at any point, never gone back to it and never caring, which is a shame because Mr Dashner isn't a bad writer.
The characters were very meh for me. Normally I would be rooting for Mark and Trina to get together and Alec would be one of my favorite characters, but I just couldn't connect. I didn't even care when any characters died. Maybe it was because I knew there was no way they could make it or maybe I'm not compatible with Mr Dashner's writing. In this case it's probably a bit of both. One thing I did like was Mark's struggle with the Flare in the latter part of the book, it was well written and I enjoyed reading him go from horror to embracing it to save his friends.
Overall, the book was ok and fans of the trilogy will probably like it, however, if you were like me and only mildly enjoyed the books than this one may be a prequel you decide to skip.
